I didn’t see an ocean until I was 14 years old. I didn’t take a dip in the ocean until I was 35. And I didn’t begin to learn its currents until three years ago. But now….I can hardly go more than a few days without connecting with the ocean again–I am literally hungry for it. Like this weekend, when I felt such a restlessness until I was out bobbing in the surf (again).
I’m beginning to wonder what will happen when I eventually move from this place. I know I won’t live in SoCal forever–so will I find some other love to replace that of the sea?
Exiled (an excerpt)
Searching my heart for its true sorrow,
This is the thing I find to be:
That I am weary of words and people,
Sick on the city, wanting the sea;Wanting the sticky, salty sweetness
Of the strong wind and shattered spray;
Wanting the loud sound and the soft sound
Of the big surf that breaks all day…If I could see the weedy museels
Crusting the wrecked and rotting hulls,
Hear once again the hungry crying
Overhead, of the wheeling gulls…I should be happy, that am happy
Never at all since I came here
I am too long away from water.
I have a need of water near.~Edna St. Vincent Millay