Jana Remy
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Jana Remy

  • Writing
    • Disability
    • Making History
    • Digital Humanities
      • dayofDH
    • Canoeing
    • Creative Nonfiction & Essays
    • Feminism
    • Bibliographies
      • Pacific Worlds Bibliography
    • Social Media
      • Mentions/Links
  • Scholarship
    • Awards/Fellowships
    • Conferences & Invited Talks
    • Collaboration
    • Workshops
    • Conference Planning
    • Technical Skills
  • Teaching
    • Blogposts About Teaching
one step at a time
deep thoughts

one step at a time

written by Jana August 31, 2010

On the wall at the ARC, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

I’m horribly afraid of heights. So much so that when I find myself in a high place, I’m tempted to just jump because I want the fear to end. Completely irrational, but that’s how it feels.

So given my fear, rock climbing is just crazy. But I kind of love it anyways. When I’m up on that wall and my heart is pounding so hard from fear, and every muscle is straining…it gives quite an adrenaline rush.

But I never look down and I never look too far ahead. I stay focused on the place where I am and the next step. I look for the nearby holds rather than looking back or down.

Though as a historian I tend to have an obsession with the past, in my own life I’m learning the importance of being present in the here and now. Rock climbing is a good reminder of that important lesson. When I concentrate on the very place where I am, the fear of what’s below or ahead just drops away.

Note: Catgirl is on one face of the wall and I’m on the other. :)

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2 comments

Elissa Minor Rust September 2, 2010 - 7:01 am

Man, this pic makes me wish I'd had time to go climbing with you guys while I was there. And now my bother had the gall to go and get a job on the East coast and remove my excuse to come visit. :(

Reply
leisurelyviking September 2, 2010 - 6:30 pm

I identify with a fear of heights, and yet I love them, too. I like to hike up to the tops of ridges and lie on my stomach with my head over the edge- so frightening yet thrilling at the same time.

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About Me

About Me

Hi there friend, and welcome to my blog. I started writing on the internet two decades ago. Since then I've started and finished a PhD program, left the Mormon church and became a Quaker, got divorced, remarried, found full-time work in academia, took up rock climbing and outrigger canoeing, and traveled across the globe (China! Belgium! Italy! Chicago! Montana! Portland! Gettysburg! and oh-so-many points in-between). This blog is eclectic and random--it has poetry and cooking and books. And cats. And flowers. And the ocean (my ocean). But in that sense it's a good reflection of me and my wide-ranging, far-reaching, magpie curiosity.

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