Author: Jana

  • on being a pilgrim…


    I became fascinated with pilgrimage journeys about six years ago when I took a Humanities class about journey narratives. I began to view my own life as a journey, and this worldview helped me to make sense of my mortality.

    I started reading all types of journey narratives, from Road from Coorainto Mutant Message Down Underto The Pilgrimage. I re-read classics like The Odysseyand Gilgamesh.

    From all of this reading and soul-searching I realized that the pilgrim motif resonated with me. By seeing life as a journey I could more fully live each day as part of that process. It made me less afraid to take steps towards my goals. It made me believe that I could achieve something heroic.

    One of the very hardest parts of my life were those days during my cancer treatments that I couldn’t even take a step by myself (or I couldn’t even push myself in a wheelchair anywhere either). More than anything I feared the loss of mobility, of progression, of autonomy, of freedom. Perhaps that is why I now feel so happy to be walking on my ‘own two feet’ and to be making progress in my daily journey.

    The little twist of irony in my blogname is that John has since begun his own pilgrimage (I guess that makes him ‘pilgrimboy’ or ‘Mr. Pilgrimgirl’). What’s cool about this is that we are fellow travelers now. We’ve both taken up the staff of the pilgrim and are charting our course through the terrain of each day together.

  • funny

    Ok, maybe you shouldn’t watch this if you’re embarrassed to be giggling in your cubicle. But if you need a good chuckle, check this out–especially the March 24th entry on “How to Kill a Ninja” (I suspect that chudacek will find it particularly amusing).

  • once in a millenia…

    On Wednesday of this week (tomorrow), at two minutes and three seconds after 1:00 in the morning, the time and date will be 01:02:03 04/05/06.

    I feel I must commemorate this somehow…any suggestions? (Other than I celebrating at 1:02 PM rather than AM)???

  • gardenlust


    garden rose
    Originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

    Picked this rose in my garden this afternoon–from an abandoned bush that I rescued and watered all winter. What a lovely fiery red!!
    It was perfect gardening weather today. We wore shorts and pulled weeds. The earth was perfectly soft from the recent rains, so it was easy work. Now that I got a little dirt under my nails I am eager to get back in and finish the huge job of weeding (we had unbelievable growth from the recent rains!)…

  • Jogathon


    E @ jogathon
    Originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

    John volunteered at the Jogathon again this year (go John!).

    I’ve uploaded a few jogging pics of the kids onto flickr. Click on the image above to see more :)

  • my Mom’ll sleep better tonite….

    Ok, for those of you who’ve been waiting to know whether or not I bought a scooter. I didn’t.

    Instead, I bought a totally-granny beachcruiser trike bike. I don’t have it in hand yet because it’s got to be all tricked-out for me (gears, toeclips, etc). Hopefully I’ll have a picture of me with my bike for you in a few weeks–after it’s all put together.

    Ironically, it cost more $$ than the used scooter that I was considering buying. But it’s oh-so-much safer. And I can ride on the bikepaths with John and the kids (joy!). And I won’t have to buy a motocycle permit.

    I’m already trying to figure out what liberal bumper stickers it’s going to wear. (I’m taking suggestions if you’ve got any for me). And, of course I can still put the baguette and roses in the back because it’s got a groovy basket between the rear wheels! (E is convinced that kids could totally ride in the back basket. She is oh-so-wrong…)

    Oh, yes, I can hear you wondering what color it is….RED, of course (did you even have to ask???)
    :)

  • Make me smile…

    –turning in grades yesterday. whew. another quarter of school all done. ate 2 do-si-dos and did some high-fives with the kiddoes to celebrate.

    –a blank page on my calendar today. still lots of stuff to do, but no classes, no appts, no meetings. woohoo!

    –crocheting. about 10 years ago my friend Mindy taught me how to crochet and since then I’ve made many crocheted items, but I’ve never learned how to read & follow a pattern. Thanks to the Happy Hooker I’m about halfway through my first follow-a-pattern project.

    –the sun is shining today, small birds are twittering on my front porch, I’m sipping hot tea w/milk, and the day stretches ahead of me with all of the joy and promise of a grassy field filled with wildflowers.
    :)

  • thoughts as I sat on the toilet this morning…

    1) Gotta clean the bathroom floor–the workers who snaked the tub drain on Tuesday left some messy places in the corners.
    2) [while gazing at shower curtain map] Colombia–why does it have such a drug problem? Is it geography-related? And why is Chile such a freaky-long skinny country?
    3) Thinking about recent netflix, Maria Full of Grace. Trying not to feel quilty for buying cut roses even through the Colombian rose plantations exploit workers and tempt them into drug-running.
    4) Must grow my own roses, then. Must go the garden soon…where are those garden catalogs?
    5) Remember that workers who snaked tub drain didn’t return basket of mags to bathroom. Must finish putting bathroom in order again. But really should clean the floor first.

  • women’s music


    .

    On Saturday John and I attended a concert, “The Feminine Voice in Music: Past Meets Present.” It was an evening of music by female composers. All of the singers and instrument-payers were also women. We drove quite a ways to attend this concert–two hours up to Ventura thru LA traffic.

    Some highlights:
    –a poem written by Julian of Norwich (1342-c.1416). It began, “As truly as God is our Father, so just as truly is he our Mother.” and in the middle of the singing switched to a solo where a lovely older woman gave voice to the divine feminine, “It is I, the wisdom of Motherhood, It is I, the light and grace of holy love…It is I who teach you to love. It is I, who teach you to desire. It is I who am the reward of all true desiring. And all shall be well.”
    In this woman’s eyes I saw my Mother–the Heavenly Mother that Mormons believe in and revere.

    –An original composition called “Mama” that is part of a requiem written by Naomi Stephan about her mother. The song had only one word, “Mama,” but was incredibly complex. Sometimes sung with joy, sometimes with reverence, sometimes with pain and fear. All of the choir members at once giving voive to that same word, repeatedly, in cacophony and harmony. It made my heart ache. I thought of the many times that I was in so much pain that the only thing I could say was “Mommy…Mommy…Mommy” over and over again like a mantra. I thought of the times when my kids both yelling “MAAHHHMMMEEE!!” at the same time was so wearying that I wanted to lock myself away to some private place where I could no longer hear their cries. I recalled the joy at hearning “mamamamama” for the first time from each child–speaking the words to my breasts as I fed them. Such a sweet and powerful word!! Naomi created magic with that song–to evoke such complex emotions with just one word…

    –Another poem set to music–this one a delight for its imagery:
    “And maybe I shall go with you, my glimmering girl
    To the land of Glyn, to the land of Myrrh
    Where cats wear gleaming fine faces and purple fur
    And the daisies bend down singing lowly: murr, murr.”
    This poem made me think of my daughter. She is (and always will be) my ‘glimmering girl.’ :)

    All-in-all, it was such a delight to hear from these women. Almost all of the singers and composers were crones–not the women that our society usually values or reveres. But their music was so moving. And they women themselves were quite dynamic. Their bodies were of all sizes and proportions, their hair many shades of color from a bottle or a variety of natural grays. They were all so beautiful to me.

  • 5ives

    from 5ives…
    Five good things to absorb while you’re still young:

    1. a lot of hippies are selfish, unpleasant, and not particularly funny
    2. people who argue well aren’t necessarily right
    3. cars are kind of a weird thing to spend a lot of money on
    4. people will do things for you if you ask them as a favor
    5. angry waiters totally do things to your food

  • campin’


    rocks
    Originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

    E&C went camping with Suz&Chris this weekend. They had a great time playing with fire, eating marshmallows, and piling up rocks.

    They came home smelling like hot dogs and dirt, with only a few ember holes in their clothes.

    Click on the picture above to see more photos of their camping adventures.