Jana Remy
  • Writing
    • Disability
    • Making History
    • Digital Humanities
      • dayofDH
    • Canoeing
    • Creative Nonfiction & Essays
    • Feminism
    • Bibliographies
      • Pacific Worlds Bibliography
    • Social Media
      • Mentions/Links
  • Scholarship
    • Awards/Fellowships
    • Conferences & Invited Talks
    • Collaboration
    • Workshops
    • Conference Planning
    • Technical Skills
  • Teaching
    • Blogposts About Teaching

Jana Remy

  • Writing
    • Disability
    • Making History
    • Digital Humanities
      • dayofDH
    • Canoeing
    • Creative Nonfiction & Essays
    • Feminism
    • Bibliographies
      • Pacific Worlds Bibliography
    • Social Media
      • Mentions/Links
  • Scholarship
    • Awards/Fellowships
    • Conferences & Invited Talks
    • Collaboration
    • Workshops
    • Conference Planning
    • Technical Skills
  • Teaching
    • Blogposts About Teaching
Monthly Archives

September 2009

a few more steps for this pilgrim soul…
deep thoughtsphoto

a few more steps for this pilgrim soul…


Cape Cod, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Picture above is one of the lonely lanes I wandered while in Cape Cod–it led down to a beach inlet where I enjoyed browsing the flats and snapping pictures.

I will admit that I wasn’t always entirely comfortable on my rambles. The lanes were often isolated and forested. I didn’t know what was lurking in the shade. I never saw other pedestrians and seldom any vehicles on the road. I was alone.

Some days I find that solitude brings a sense of confidence–I love doing things by myself and not having dependencies on others. But some days I crave knowing that others are close by. And today is one of those days. I’m feeling insecure and desire validation. Most likely this stems from a realization of how misunderstood my life is to others–especially those who don’t understand an intentional choice of small footprint living, who don’t understand that I am a gypsy at heart and I would far rather have experiences (or kittens) than fancy stuff. “Things” bring me very little joy. I am a person who likes to pack light and keep it simple. In addition, I don’t get much satisfaction from being so focused on the future that I can’t enjoy today. Thoughts of eternal consequences are so remote. Instead, I’m present in this very day and this very moment. I am as easily delighted by a spiderweb as by a sweet strawberry from my garden. And they are both the face of the divine to me.

So I’m in the process now, of making choices that may alienate me from friends who can’t understand my heart and my soul. Who don’t understand why my authenticity can be more important than my certainty. It’s hard for me to do this–I don’t like black and white choices. I’m more comfortable with zones of gray (and brown and vermilion and azure-blue). I want pictures and poetry and sunshine. I want the waves crashing so loudly around me that I can forget those who just don’t understand me anymore.

September 30, 2009
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water, water, everywhere…
things I like

water, water, everywhere…


sitting in the water, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

This morning I opted for cross-training and did a session at the gym rather than paddling in the Back Bay or going for a swim. But all day I’ve had this ‘unfinished’ feeling. And I just realized, after watching the trailer for this outrigger film that I’m just hungry for the open water, for the thrill and the fear of it. For diving deep and moving freely.

Bench pressing just isn’t going to do it for me anymore, I suppose…

Pic above of me in Walden Pond last week. I was giddy with the pleasure of swimming around in such a gorgeous body of water! Kudos to ECS for snapping a few pics of me while I swam & played. :)

September 29, 2009
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things past & present
deep thoughts

things past & present


I’ll be visiting Denver next week to attend a History conference. Of course I’m looking forward to it–autumn in the Mile High City is always spectacular!

But you know what’s even better than spending a few days with my colleagues in the shadows of the Rockies? Thanks to the magic of FaceBook, I’ll be reuniting with some old friends while I’m there, even my best friend from Middle School. It’s been 25 years since we attended school together in the suburbs of Denver and a whole lot of life has happened since then. But I can’t wait to get caught up!

And, in the spirit of remembering things past, while I’m in Denver I’ll be spending time in the archives of the Children’s Hospital–where my bone cancer was treated so many years ago. I’ll be employing my historian skills in reading my medical files this time, rather than the records of 19th-century medical patients. While I was undergoing my treatments I was so ill that I can’t remember much from that time period at all–my mind blocked out much of the trauma. So I’m looking forward to finding those years of my life once again.

Picture of me and DeeDee at Winter Park, just a few months after my amputation surgery. I’m wearing about a dozen bracelets on my arm, and you know what’s funny about that? At dinnertime tonite I was remarking on Catgirl’s bracelets and telling her how I used to wear similar ones back when I was her age. :)

September 29, 2009
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things past & present
deep thoughts

things past & present


I’ll be visiting Denver next week to attend a History conference. Of course I’m looking forward to it–autumn in the Mile High City is always spectacular!

But you know what’s even better than spending a few days with my colleagues in the shadows of the Rockies? Thanks to the magic of FaceBook, I’ll be reuniting with some old friends while I’m there, even my best friend from Middle School. It’s been 25 years since we attended school together in the suburbs of Denver and a whole lot of life has happened since then. But I can’t wait to get caught up!

And, in the spirit of remembering things past, while I’m in Denver I’ll be spending time in the archives of the Children’s Hospital–where my bone cancer was treated so many years ago. I’ll be employing my historian skills in reading my medical files this time, rather than the records of 19th-century medical patients. While I was undergoing my treatments I was so ill that I can’t remember much from that time period at all–my mind blocked out much of the trauma. So I’m looking forward to finding those years of my life once again.

Picture of me and DeeDee at Winter Park, just a few months after my amputation surgery. I’m wearing about a dozen bracelets on my arm, and you know what’s funny about that? At dinnertime tonite I was remarking on Catgirl’s bracelets and telling her how I used to wear similar ones back when I was her age. :)

September 29, 2009
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off-season
photo

off-season


Cape Cod, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

As part of my New England travels last week, I had a few spare days in between various meetings. So I decided to book a room by myself at a charming Cape Cod B&B called The Old Sea Pines Inn. While there I spent nearly all day writing, only venturing out in the late afternoons for walks around the environs. What a heavenly experience!

It was off-season in the Cape, so everything was quite quiet. I got a reduced rate at the Inn and even though I was technically sharing a bathroom, I was never actually sharing with anyone. The breakfasts were large and tasty and there was “tea” each afternoon (which I loved, of course). The front veranda was perfect for reading in the evening, the back porch was an idyllic spot for breakfast, and the parlor had plenty of cozy couches for all-day writing sessions.

I expect to return again soon enough–though I’d like to bring my family along next time and share some of the Cape magic with them!

P.S. There’s a charming bookstore just one block down the street from the Inn, which is definitely an asset to any vacation spot! Thumbs up to the clerk who not only helped me find Mary Oliver, but also gave me a pen so I could mark my favorite lines.

Picture taken in the Old Sea Pines Inn garden–a lovely spot for weddings!

September 27, 2009
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simple pleasures
Random

simple pleasures


brooke likes peaches for breakfast, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Spent today hanging out with new & old friends in New Haven. Enjoyed a charming used bookshop, a lunch of split pea soup & a mozzarella sandwich, the laughter of small children, visiting Prof. Williams’ new office, and one more pass in front of the Skull & Bones club (creepy). Oh, and that spontaneous $1 brownie was well-worth it, too, even if it did result in much spillage of spicy cocoa powder…

I wish (oh how I wish) that Irvine had such groovy used bookstores(!). And I wish (oh how I wish) that geography didn’t separate me from dear friends so frequently…

September 26, 2009
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deep thoughts

140

Telling my stories, 140 characters at a time. If you want to hear more about my travel adventures, follow me on twitter. :)

September 24, 2009
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having fun in Walden Pond
Random

having fun in Walden Pond


backfloat, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

Accomplished one more thing on my bucket list today. Swimming in Walden Pond. Joy!

September 24, 2009
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a sense of vastness on such a morning
Random

a sense of vastness on such a morning


giantess on Cape Cod, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

From Clare Leighton’s “Magic of the Flats” in Where Land Meets Sea:

The flats hold a subtle, rather than an obvious, beauty. It is the beauty of uncountable gradations of tone and hue, of the sheen and polish of exposed wet sand at low water. It is a world of reflections upon wet sand at low water. It is a world of reflections upon the wet sand from the slanted light of the morning sky.

There is a sense of vastness on such a morning. This stretch of mud and sand, merging imperceptibly in the far distance into remote water, seems to extend into eternity. In such a light, time and space become intermingled; we can no longer distinguish one from the other.

But it is not only the muted, opalescent coloring of the wet sand, shimmering and glinting upon the bed of the withdrawn ocean that holds such magic. There are uncountable variations of form here, too. For this is the whole earth in microcosm, with Lilliputian valleys and hills, gorges and plateaux. It might be said to be a child’s world, everything within grasp of the hand, the range of the eye.

I suspect that the folks here in Cape Cod think I’m a little dotty, wandering around with camera in hand to capture all the amazing colors and textures of this place…

September 22, 2009
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because we are the music…
Random

because we are the music…


Cape Cod beach, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

“Behind the cotton wool [of life] is hidden a pattern…the whole world is a work of art [and] we are part of the works of art…there is no Shakespeare, there is no Beethoven, certainly and emphatically there is no God; we are the Gods; we are the music; we are the thing itself.”
~Virginia Woolf

I’ve been immersing myself in the art of the beach these past few days. I’ve found myself wondering if every bit of seaweed is as unique as a snowflake…

September 22, 2009
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I was lost…
deep thoughts

I was lost…


cemetery, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

In my wanderings yesterday I didn’t find the beach access road that I was searching for. But when I saw a small lane called “Old Cemetery Rd,” I knew I was in for a treat (maybe even a better treat than the bowl of clam chowder that I’d just finished eating?)…

I can spend hours among gravestones.

This particular cemetery was a mix of old and new. Some headstones were from the early 19th century and some were from last year. I loved them all.

Currently posting from the old-timey parlor of a Cape Cod inn. The stereo in here is belting out Beatles tunes. I am finding it very hard not to sing along, but don’t want to alarm the retiree-crowd that’s napping/reading newspapers in here…And in a moment I am off for another wander (this time maybe I will find the beach!) where I hope to find myself a crab dinner…

September 21, 2009
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Cape Cod at sunset
Random

Cape Cod at sunset


Cape Cod at sunset, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

The ocean, it is calling my name…

September 19, 2009
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About Me

About Me

Hi there friend, and welcome to my blog. I started writing on the internet two decades ago. Since then I've started and finished a PhD program, left the Mormon church and became a Quaker, got divorced, remarried, found full-time work in academia, took up rock climbing and outrigger canoeing, and traveled across the globe (China! Belgium! Italy! Chicago! Montana! Portland! Gettysburg! and oh-so-many points in-between). This blog is eclectic and random--it has poetry and cooking and books. And cats. And flowers. And the ocean (my ocean). But in that sense it's a good reflection of me and my wide-ranging, far-reaching, magpie curiosity.

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