Category: friends

  • on swimming, by moonlight


    Moon Hiding, originally uploaded by vajra.

    During my recent trip to Albuquerque I took very few pictures. I think I needed to just experience the trip rather than document it visually. So here are a few verbal ‘snapshots’ of my travels to share with you:

    –Desert rain as I arrived in town. The shuttle driver telling me that I should have brought an umbrella. The smell of the wet hot breeze wafting across adobe plazas.

    –Swimming by moonlight in a courtyard pool (this very moon that vajra captured in her photo), after sweet-talking a security guard into letting me (& friends) stay past closing time. Then the tolling of bells ringing out over the city, marking the late hour.

    –the characters of Albuquerque including the eccentric Ben Michael whose rustic restaurant and anti-corporate rants charmed me, the baker who admitted that he liked processed bread better than the flaky handmade pastries of his that I enjoyed, the waitress at Julia’s who was so hospitable that I couldn’t help but adore her quirky cafe (and oh, those watermelon napkins, the hot green chile sauce that liquified my sinuses and the honey & frybread that reminded me so much of mom’s sopapillas that I was a child again), and the random strangers, including the hardened-looking man smoking with his buddy who was so eager to give me directions thru Old Town.

    –agave tea at the KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid) cafe, that made my throat feel so much better

    –my colleagues: who are brilliant and witty. I loved sitting around the table & hearing about their research and their dreams for the future. There’s such comfort in knowing that I’m not alone in my passion for the past, and that there are others who share my quirkiness. I especially appreciated their tolerance for my complete lack of direction, so when I said “I think that cafe is somewhere over there,” they were willing to follow (and gently nudge me in the correct direction along the way).

    –the salty-looking shuttle driver as I left town, who had a PhD in Philosophy and who helped me remember that anyone might be so terrifically interesting and well-spoken that I need to be ‘present’ even at 5 am after a night of fitful sleep.

    PS: pic above taken by Vajra, who I met up with (in person!) while in Albuquerque. What fun it was to get a text message saying “I’m wearing a large blue hat and sitting in the plaza on the west side of the San Felipe church.” The wandering around that ensued as I asked locals “which way is west?,” “Where is the church?,” etc, was the best possible treasure hunt!

  • thank you from Huang Meihua


    Huang Meihua, the 12 year-old girl who was the recipient of my birthday wish donations, sent this thank you note to me and to all of those who contributed. Our money was wired to her family this week, for her ongoing medical care (and specifically for those prosthetic legs that she needs).

    Friends, you are WONDERFUL.

    A note for you:

    I’m Brecken, the director of HandReach — the one who got to actually collect the money that Jana raised for her birthday wish to Meihua, the 12-year-old in China whose legs had been amputated in the Sichuan earthquake. We wired the money Jana raised to Meihua’s family about a week ago, and our coordinator in China told Meihua how “Auntie Jana” had raised this money in honor of her own birthday. Meihua said she was very touched and inspired by Jana’s big heart, thinking of others instead of just thinking about her own life. She said she hopes to grow up to be a woman like Jana someday and help children who need it. I’ll be meeting Meihua personally in a couple of weeks, and will look forward to sharing the photos of Meihua’s new prosthetic legs with Jana and all of her wonderful friends!

  • A FaceBook & Social Media Success Story

    As my birthday neared last month I received an email from the Facebook “Causes” application, suggesting that I could put a Birthday Wish on my FB page to gather donations for a favorite charity in lieu of birthday gifts. At first I was reluctant to participate. I tend to dislike FB apps and I don’t want to annoy my FB friends with frivolous emails or requests. However, I let the idea gel for a few days and then decided that it might be worth fundraising for HandReach, a non-profit that provides and education and medical care for children in China. When my friend Brecken (who works for HandReach) visited a few weeks ago I felt drawn to her stories of the children who were severely burned or disabled and were in need of prosthetics to replace missing limbs.

    So I decided to jump in and do it, despite my initial hesitancy. As I logged onto the application it gave me many options for my “wish,” including setting a suggested donation amount ($38 because I was turning 38 years old), sending out individual messages to each of my FB friends, letting the application take over my status messages for the duration of the fundraising, and setting a reasonable campaign goal (I chose $380 thinking that maybe 10 of my friends might want to contribute).

    What ensued blew me away.

    I met my $380 goal within a few hours, then upped it to $600 and met that quickly, too. I then set the seemingly unreachable goal of $1000 and met that long before my actual birthday. What an amazing experience it was to see the donations and well-wishes pouring in from friends near and far.

    Words aren’t enough to tell you how much joy it brought to be a part of this campaign and to experience the goodness and generosity of my friends. And I’d call this a tremendous success story for the potential of social media. While I think Facebook and Twitter can be huge time-wasters, they also have HUGE potential for connecting groups of likeminded people for doing good. We saw this with the impact of social media on the last election and I’m sure that we will continue to see its ripple effects in the months and years to come. It’s invigorating (even seductive) to participate in these forms of media and to get a feel for their immediacy and power.

    After the hoopla of my Birthday Wish was over, one of the developers of the Causes application contacted me about the success of my fundraising efforts. From her I learned that my Wish had earned more funding than most, and they wanted learn why I was so successful. In a nutshell, these were my thoughts:

    I picked this particular organization because they give money for medical care to amputees in China–I am an amputee myself so this is a Cause that I’m passionate about and that most of my friends have sympathy for through my experiences. My advice to those who are considering a Birthday Wish is to choose an organization that reflects your own experiences and interests–so your friends will feel invested in supporting your Cause.

    One reason I believe I received so many donations is that I not only had FB announcing my Cause, but I also did daily blogposts leading up to my birthday about my Wish, I tweeted the link daily, which was ‘re-tweeted’ by some friends.

    I found myself incredibly satisfied with the overall functionality of the Causes application and would encourage each of you to consider a Birthday Wish campaign. I look forward to seeing what Cause would motivate you to forgo birthday presents, and wish the developers of this application the best of luck in their efforts in using Facebook for such positive ends.

  • A FaceBook & Social Media Success Story

    As my birthday neared last month I received an email from the Facebook “Causes” application, suggesting that I could put a Birthday Wish on my FB page to gather donations for a favorite charity in lieu of birthday gifts. At first I was reluctant to participate. I tend to dislike FB apps and I don’t want to annoy my FB friends with frivolous emails or requests. However, I let the idea gel for a few days and then decided that it might be worth fundraising for HandReach, a non-profit that provides and education and medical care for children in China. When my friend Brecken (who works for HandReach) visited a few weeks ago I felt drawn to her stories of the children who were severely burned or disabled and were in need of prosthetics to replace missing limbs.

    So I decided to jump in and do it, despite my initial hesitancy. As I logged onto the application it gave me many options for my “wish,” including setting a suggested donation amount ($38 because I was turning 38 years old), sending out individual messages to each of my FB friends, letting the application take over my status messages for the duration of the fundraising, and setting a reasonable campaign goal (I chose $380 thinking that maybe 10 of my friends might want to contribute).

    What ensued blew me away.

    I met my $380 goal within a few hours, then upped it to $600 and met that quickly, too. I then set the seemingly unreachable goal of $1000 and met that long before my actual birthday. What an amazing experience it was to see the donations and well-wishes pouring in from friends near and far.

    Words aren’t enough to tell you how much joy it brought to be a part of this campaign and to experience the goodness and generosity of my friends. And I’d call this a tremendous success story for the potential of social media. While I think Facebook and Twitter can be huge time-wasters, they also have HUGE potential for connecting groups of likeminded people for doing good. We saw this with the impact of social media on the last election and I’m sure that we will continue to see its ripple effects in the months and years to come. It’s invigorating (even seductive) to participate in these forms of media and to get a feel for their immediacy and power.

    After the hoopla of my Birthday Wish was over, one of the developers of the Causes application contacted me about the success of my fundraising efforts. From her I learned that my Wish had earned more funding than most, and they wanted learn why I was so successful. In a nutshell, these were my thoughts:

    I picked this particular organization because they give money for medical care to amputees in China–I am an amputee myself so this is a Cause that I’m passionate about and that most of my friends have sympathy for through my experiences. My advice to those who are considering a Birthday Wish is to choose an organization that reflects your own experiences and interests–so your friends will feel invested in supporting your Cause.

    One reason I believe I received so many donations is that I not only had FB announcing my Cause, but I also did daily blogposts leading up to my birthday about my Wish, I tweeted the link daily, which was ‘re-tweeted’ by some friends.

    I found myself incredibly satisfied with the overall functionality of the Causes application and would encourage each of you to consider a Birthday Wish campaign. I look forward to seeing what Cause would motivate you to forgo birthday presents, and wish the developers of this application the best of luck in their efforts in using Facebook for such positive ends.

  • from blossoms (and peaches)

    peach blossom

    from blossoms

    from blossoms comes
    this brown paper bag of peaches
    we bought from the joy
    at the bend in the road where we turned toward
    signs painted peaches.

    from laden boughs, from hands,
    from sweet fellowship in the bins,
    comes nectar at the roadside, succulent
    peaches we devour, dusty skin and all,
    comes the familiar dust of summer, dust we eat.

    o, to take what we love inside,
    to carry within us an orchard, to eat
    not only the skin, but the shade,
    not only the sugar, but the days, to hold
    the fruit in our hands, adore it, then bite into
    the round jubilance of peach.

    there are days we live
    as if death were nowhere
    in the background; from joy
    to joy to joy, from wing to wing,
    from blossom to blossom to
    impossible blossom, to sweet impossible blossom.

    ~li-young lee

    (h/t to vintagedramas for the poem)

    My peach tree is chock-full of hard green knobs right now. And as I do every year around this time, I am dreaming of peaches

  • Surfer Girls.


    Surfer Girls., originally uploaded by mind on fire.

    My first surf lesson. Very fun. Didn’t surf much but I laughed hard and swallowed much salty water.

    Thanks Elise and Ryan! :)

  • a quarter of a century

    On this day, 25 years ago, I was sitting in a hospital bed surrounded by family members as my doctors told me that my leg would have to be amputated due to the large cancerous tumor in my knee. I tell you…my life seemed over at that moment. Over.

    I was 12 years old and had just had my first chemo treatment. I’d been vomiting repeatedly and knew that my hair would soon fall out. Two days before I’d had a biopsy of my knee to confirm the diagnosis of osteosarcoma. But even after I learned that it was cancer and learned that I would have months and months of high-dose chemotherapy, it had never occurred to me that I would lose my leg.

    I’m usually been rather blue on the anniversary of my cancer diagnosis. It’s a hard time with many painful memories that resurface. But this year is totally different.

    In case you hadn’t heard the news already via FaceBook, I wanted all of you to know that I, or shall I say WE, met and exceeded the goal of raising $1000 for HandReach and for Huang Meihua’s prosthetic legs. I’m crying right now as I type this. Big hot tears of joy. Sure, I’ve “lost” a few things over the years…but in the meantime I’ve gained the most amazing friends. Saying thank you is just not enough, but I’ll say it anyways: Thank You! You are the best. You really are. Now go and have a wonderful weekend knowing that we just accomplished something absolutely amazing together.

    :)

  • one of those moments…


    joy!, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

    Life has had its share of stresses and frustrations lately, so much so that for about the past three months I’ve had to put effort into finding space to “get away from it all for awhile.” Though I love the work I do as a PhD student, it has a way of filling up my mind and my life in ways that make it difficult to ever feel like I have time off.

    So Saturday was one of those moments when John and I were able to escape for a bit of a date night (time for just the two of us–yay!) and chose to watch a friend’s Roller Derby team match. It’s a pretty unlikely event for me to attend, so the novelty made it even more fun, I’d say.

    I really loved this picture of me with Alicia (wearing her cute roller derby uniform)–it’s so spontaneous and happy.

    Pic by John

  • just the two of us


    post-concert Japanese food–YUM!, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

    Being the highly social creatures that John and I are, we tend to do LOTS OF STUFF with friends. For example, when we drop by the pub we tend to do a shout-out to the local crowd, when there’s a cultural event happening we invite along other artsy folks, when we travel we plan meetups with all of favorite farflung peeps, and when we have a free evening, there’s always something to celebrate at chez Remy. (ok, and even our anniversary trip to Boston two years ago–we either stayed with or metup with friends nearly every bit of the way…)

    Oy.

    We’ve decided it’s time to carve out some space for just the two of us and we’re brainstorming what that might look like…another trip together, perhaps (both Boston and Toronto are enticing us)? A weekly John/Jana datenight? A regular lunchtime meetup?

    How do you create space for you and your partner in the midst of a busy and friend-filled life?

  • just beachy :)


    Had gorgeous weather this weekend and wonderful friends to spend it with. :)

  • signed by AFP


    Amanda Palmer signs my foot at secret Los Angeles show, originally uploaded by pilgrimgirl.

    Had a spontaneous meetup with rockstarAmanda Palmer this afternoon (at an intimate local venue after she twittered an invitation)…

    The whole experience echoed my previous experience with Amanda, but this was far more relaxed and unscripted. We stood at her feet as she played and sang, we all sat around and chatted on some couches during and after her interview with the “After Ellen” show (the episode will air in 2 weeks, we were told).

    In all, it was a successful social media experience. A rockstar throws out the invitation for a meetup and John & I decided it was worth the adventure so we went.

    I had her sign my prosthetic foot, so she’s officially the first artist to take up the call to decorate my leg. She hardly batted an eye when I suggested that she sign my foot and everyone around us thought it an uber-cool idea. The picture didn’t turn out so well, but that’s what happens with spontaneity, I suppose.

    :)

    PS: Amanda hugged everyone afterwards as if she were our best friend. I was a bit surprised by the familiarity at first and then just enjoyed it. It must be quite a skill to be able to treat your fans as if each one was someone that you care deeply about. Undoubtedly that is her gift–when she sings it’s as if it is just you and her, and that carries through in her post-performance affability.

    UPDATE: John’s pic of my foot is so much better than my feeble effort…


  • It’s a rare thing to meet a kindred spirit, much less one whose body is so akin to my own and who knows the terrain of cancer even better than I.

    Sara, when I think of you I remember our adventure-filled days together, your amazing baked goods, your love for all things cat (especially that wily Sam-kitty), your persistence at living by your conscience, your cozy book-filled home with its crazy slope-y wooden floors and our sharing a rich dark brew while gazing out over your garden. And of course, paddling together down the Concord river last fall when the leaves were turning and the sun was so bright that it made my eyes water…just as they are now, upon learning of your death.

    You were beautiful and good and real. Thank you for sharing your self with me.

    Picture of Sara and me on the banks of Walden Pond, Fall 2007