I didn’t see an ocean until I was 14 years old. I didn’t take a dip in the ocean until I was 35. And I didn’t begin to learn its currents until three years ago. But now….I can hardly go more than a few days without connecting with the ocean again–I am literally hungry for it. Like this weekend, when I felt such a restlessness until I was out bobbing in the surf (again).
I’m beginning to wonder what will happen when I eventually move from this place. I know I won’t live in SoCal forever–so will I find some other love to replace that of the sea?
Exiled (an excerpt)
Searching my heart for its true sorrow,
This is the thing I find to be:
That I am weary of words and people,
Sick on the city, wanting the sea;
Wanting the sticky, salty sweetness
Of the strong wind and shattered spray;
Wanting the loud sound and the soft sound
Of the big surf that breaks all day…
If I could see the weedy museels
Crusting the wrecked and rotting hulls,
Hear once again the hungry crying
Overhead, of the wheeling gulls…
I should be happy, that am happy
Never at all since I came here
I am too long away from water.
I have a need of water near.
~Edna St. Vincent Millay